Defining Success
Lately I've been thinking a lot about what success actually means and how definitions of success differ so much from person to person. After a lot of thought, I want to talk about defining success personally.
Contrary to popular opinion, success is not always a clear cut definition that means the same thing to everyone.
To some, financial success is where it's at, having lots of money in a bank account and traveling the world. To others, Success means staying home and raising kind-hearted kids. To others, success is enough money to pay their bills on time and having a few close, authentic relationships. Some people have a success criteria of a big house and an academic career.
There are many types of success in life. One is not better or more noble than the other, but it's so important to understand what your unique own definition of success is. There are no wrong answers in your personal success.
After all, if we don't, we start chasing other people's versions of success. We subconsciously set goals based on what we see on the internet or what our friends or family's belief of success is.
It can be so difficult to step outside the box and not fulfill others' expectations of us. However, it's so important in order to create a more intentional life that is authentic to you, on your own terms.
This reminds me of the story of a fisherman that I believe I first heard from Tim Ferris:
The story goes that there was a business coach that took a vacation in Italy and met a really lovely fisherman there. They got to talking and the fisherman told this business coach all about how much he loved being a fisherman.
He loved waking up early and the smell of the water and watching the sunrise. He loved his friends that he had kept since childhood. He loved that they all had fishing boats now, and how they would often go out for breakfast or lunch after work.
After work, the fisherman loved his schedule and how his family helped him run his booth at the market.
They didn't make a lot of money. In fact, money was really tight, but there were so many aspects of being a fisherman that he just loved.
The business coach gave it some thought and said, “Okay…. I can help you grow and scale your business.” Which by the way, is his way of defining success- not necessarily the fishermen's.
The fishermen said, “Well, what would that mean?”
And the coach said, “Well, you'd need to move to New York- It's a beautiful city. You'll love it so much! We would work about 60 hours a week- that's just part of it. I'll teach you how to grow your team.
You can raise money, you'll start making investments. Eventually after several years, you'll have a successful fleet of fishing boats and eventually, you could sell the company for a lot of money.
The fisherman scratched his chin and said, “But then what?”
And the business coach replied, “Then you can do whatever you want!”
The fisherman says, “But what I would want is to move back to Italy and be with my family and have a fishing boat and see my friends and wake up early and smell the water and watch the sunrise each day.”
I feel like the story is so introspective, because so often we chase careers and statuses that do not truly fuel us. We all think that we have to be stay-at-home-moms, or be highlty successful in some way in order to be fulfilled. We think we have to always be putting out maximum effort.. when that’s just not true. Different people need different things. It's all in your state of mind.
There's just so many options out there and you can design your day-to-day to be whatever lights you up! You are the one defining your idea of success.
There's so much more options than trying to fit yourself into one person's version of success. There really are few things less fulfilling than working a job you hate to buy things you don't need to impress people you don't care about. What kind of quality of life is that?
It's just short and sweet, but I have a couple journal prompts that are a great way open up the idea of what your unique version of success is.
These following questions will help you get a little bit more intentional about it and find a starting point in the right direction for a successful life. Feel free to grab a pen and paper, or if you're driving, just kind of think of these as we're moving along.
I want you to think first and foremost, are you successful and why, and if not, what would it take for you to view yourself as successful?
The next step on the right path: Have you ever felt successful in your own life in the past and what led to that success and who were you not, what were you doing, but who were you when that success happened?
Were you waking up early and showing up for your calendar consistently?
Were you networking more often? Looking back, are there little things that you might have left behind about yourself that were hugely beneficial? Things you're missing? What areas of my life have made me happy? This can be a great little practice to start implementing.
Who has helped you win in the past? Who are some successful people you admire, and how can you make them a more consistent part of your life? What are the qualities of those people that you love the most?
I really hope that these questions helped to create more clarity. It’s beneficial to kind of take a step back and, and reevaluate what you are chasing and why.
Can you see better what your vision is for yourself, and the life that you're creating for yourself?
When it comes down to it, if you are not chasing your unique vision, then it's going to lead to unfulfillment regardless of how much success you achieve. This has been a difficult lesson for so many people. However, as humans, we seem to just keep chasing it.
We keep hitting our heads against this wall that we don't have to. I feel like if we can unpack what true success means, it can give so much clarity to our own path.
Now that we’ve gone about defining your personal definition of success and what it means to you, you can create your life vision and personal goals with more ease. I encourage you to go back and at least listen to the prompts again.
Go through these steps thoughtfully, if you didn’t get a pen and paper, it might really help to lay out your thoughts better. I've really put a lot of thought into laying this road map.. It’s more of a step by step approach that has been hugely impactful for me.
I really hope that you guys enjoyed this and it was helpful. I hope you spent some time defining success for yourself. I hope it gives you some peace of mind. Feel free to send me a DM on Instagram, and let me know what you're liking.
I would love to know what you think, and what your definition of success is.
Our Instagram account is @Lunarherbals, and I would love to hear from you.Thank you so much for taking the time. I know there's a ton of information out there, and so I'm just so grateful to you for taking the time to join me and create a vision of success.
If you liked this, don't forget to get your hands on my free download: Eight Quick and Easy Intentional Morning Rituals. It's my gift to you to help elevate your every day. In the meantime, I can't wait to hear from you. Take care!
